joanie of arc w/ evie from the garden

Childhood

2008-11-16T23:02:00.002-05:00

I was cleaning up one of the spare rooms in my house which tends to be used for storage. I found my memory boxes! Basically just shoeboxes where I've thrown a bunch of stuff that I wanted to keep. So there are a variety of notes (remember those note passing days?) that i'd received. I love notes! I tend to stock pile any notes that I receive which is why i have an impossible time deleting e-mails.

I found a diary that I wrote when I was in elementary school. The majority of entries along the lines of "I really like (insert boy name)." Or my favorite "I wasn't paying attention for like ten seconds and they scored a goal." Obviously as goalie on a soccer team that had to have been a tramatic experience for a 10 yr old. ;) The things we get upset about as children. LOVE IT!

ohh... what else did I find... I found a name tag from my first job at White Castle. God I hated that job. But options were limited at 16. I loved the lable that I stuck to the back that said "BITCH." Classic.

The best things that I found are these two collages that I put together when I was about 17 or 18 to mail to a few friends I had around the world. How fun is it that I was able to mail something to Australia and England? I'm curious as hell to find out if either of the people I sent them to still have them. I'm debating messaging them out of the blue and asking.

I can't remember anything else of import that I found other than pictures.. lots of pictures. :) I hoard them almost as bad as notes and cards.

Forever

2008-11-16T23:00:00.001-05:00

I've randomly decided to start posting again. It's kind of been forever and a day.... I figure, if I'm paying money for the site, I should probably use it. :D

innocence

2008-06-03T22:31:00.003-04:00

the innocence of a child is
seen only through the passion
they show each day for things
that we pass by so quickly.
how hard it is to grin so broadly
at first light christmas morning
for now that we've grown older
everythign has lost its joy.
we hold our heads so high above
the crowds on equal levels
that we forget the love we had
then for everything around.
how painful it is to acknowledge
the loss of compassion we've felt
as the years fade away so quickly.
the innocence of a child is apparent
in the fear of those monsters in
the closet or hiding under the bed.
but now the fear of failure
encompasses our minds
as we step up higher on
that steep business ladder.
the innocence of a child
is presented in the love they
show and give so freely of.
but now we protect our hearts
and open them to no one
for fear of getting hurt
or ending up tied down.
the innocence of a child is
seen only through the passion
they show each day for things
that we pass by so quickly.

Un Poema

2008-06-02T17:21:00.002-04:00

¿Como sabes quien soy?
Cuando yo no se ádonde voy.
¿Como sabes la realidad?
Cuando no escuchas la verdad.
No comprendes mi corazon
ni te sientes ninguan emoción.

Oh that is so a poem from second year spanish. It probably doesn't even make since but I felt the need to share.

I can't help but wonder...

2008-06-01T21:27:00.005-04:00

do my old friends ever think of me? People I was once close to and have since lost touch... do they, like me, look at something and think of times long past? I'm simply in one of those moods where I cannot help but regret those friendships I've let slip away. The angry conversations that ended it. With some, I remember the last time we spoke. That very last coversation. And I remember slowly letting go of those few reminders I had left. It's weird. With all the technology and the search engines, the people I really want to find have simply disappeared.

I was thinking....

2008-05-22T01:02:00.004-04:00

the other day about whether or not random people bitch about me. Here's the thing... if someone is an idiot while driving and almost wrecks me or cuts me off, I go into work complaining about "that freaking moron who doesn't know how to drive" and how he/she tried to run me off the road. So I was wondering how many stories I've been the star of as "that freaking idiot" didn't see me and cut me off. Or that "freaking idiot" was in the fast lane driving 50 mph when the speed limit was 55!

I once heard someone say that everyone thinks they are the best driver out there.

"Anyone going slower than me is a moron and anyone going faster is a jackass."

so my problem....

2008-05-14T22:42:00.001-04:00

with posting is that I always think of something that I want to write about during the day. Some frustration or whatever and then by the time I get home and on the computer to update, I forget what I wanted to say. I have a terrible memory.

All I'm saying...

2008-05-10T15:04:00.003-04:00

is that watching movies for me is an attempt to escape reality for a few hours... why in the world would I want to watch something with a depressing/horrible ending?

I just don't understand the point of watching movies like that. The movies I've seen recently either have a non-existent ending with nothing actually happening or everyone dies.

What the hell? Life is already depressing and miserable. I just don't know why I need to pay to see something that I can watch on the news at night. People die tragic deaths in real life. I don't need to see it on the silver screen or whatever it's called.

movies and books

2008-05-07T22:31:00.002-04:00

I recently read Great Expectations by Charles Dickens. What a freaking depressing book. Everyone is miserable throughout the entire book, and in the end, everyone is still freaking miserable! I know I'm a dork for reading it, but I love to read. Classics are usually so much fun to read because it gives one a sense of the past or what was going on... I mean even Jane Austen's novels had happy endings. The girl got the guy. There's always some drama along the way, but everyone who's anyone ends up in love and happy. Who wouldn't love Mr. Darcy?

Romance novels are so cheesy sometimes, but after a good cry and laugh, everyone ends up happy.

It's the same with movies for me.

Okay... so i really love romantic comedies. I love the happy endings. Nothing makes me happier (okay very little) than a nice clean cut happy ending. (oops. that sounds a little pornish) I just like for everything to work out. The good guys win and the bad guys get what they had coming to them.

life is insane!

2008-05-07T22:24:00.002-04:00

I never thought that it would be that damn difficult to work full time and go to school part time. It has been an insane time.

The biggest problem with getting on the computer is that I'm on the damn thing all day long. And then I come home and get online to check Oncourse (the only system for school). I'm usually tire of sitting in a chair at a desk by then.

I despise talking on the phone. I work in a call center environment. Let me tell you... after talking to *extreme sarcasm* lovely intelligent people all day long, I don't want to talk anymore! I love my family, but seriously... calling me six times in a row is not going to make me any more likely to pick up the phone. If it's that freaking important leave a message!

I know everyone is thinking "poor me." Well why not? everyone else has the the poor me attitude. I listen to it everyday all day long. Poor me.

My Aunt Recently Passed Away.....

2008-03-16T21:29:00.006-04:00

My aunt recently passed away and now my mom is raising my little seven year old cousin. She is absolutely adorable, but this poor girl as been through hell. Although it's an odd thing to share, my aunt died of a drug overdose. There were three kids (my little cousins) all under the age of ten present at the house the night she died. One of here "friends" came over the next morning and realized she was cold. My question remains... how many times had she passed out and the children not been able to wake her up for them not to notice anything out of the ordinary?

Old Times

2008-01-23T21:31:00.000-05:00

What I really miss about the old days (meaning simply, about 10 years ago back when I used to "chat" online all the time) are my friends from around the world. It was so easy to find people to talk to that seemed (or at least acted) halfway normal. I really loved that my parents used to give me a "time limit" for how long I could be online. This was not very effective considering they went to bed way earlier than I did.

But now... well now I simply feel out of the loop. That could possibly be because I feel too damn old to hang out online and talk or I am just not nearly as naive as I was then... I mean I have a myspace page or whatever but I really just did that out of curiousity (which really did kill the cat). But now I just read the news and plan imaginary trips around the world. wow. I really am boring.

Español

2008-01-17T22:13:00.000-05:00

El profesor de mi clase de español me dijo que necesito escribir más en español para mejorar. El problema es que no tengo el vocabulario necesario para escribir algo interesante. Puedo entender más que puedo hablar y escribir. Entonces, estoy escribiendo mucho pero al mismo tiempo escribo nada.
Qué bueno, ¿no?

Espero que en el futuro podrá describir algo más cómico (gracioso) y divertido.

All about me...

2008-01-14T20:41:00.000-05:00

I know... you're all dying to know more about me. I received this in an e-mail and through I'd share my answers....

1. Were you named after anyone? -- my middle name after my grandma
2. When was the last time you cried? -- a few days ago
3. Do you like your handwriting? -- depends on the day
4. What is your favorite lunch meat? -- brown sugar ham
5. Do you have kids? -- God no. unless you count my doggie.
6. If you were another person, would you be friends with you?--not if I could avoid it. :)
7. Do you use sarcasm a lot? -- me?! no never! well... maybe a little
8. Do you still have your tonsils? -- they are still there somewhere
9. Would you bungee jump? -- not a chance in hell
10. What is your favorite cereal? -- apple jacks or golden grahams
11. Do you untie your shoes when you take them off? -- nope
12. Do you think you're strong? -- of course. i've survived a lot, so i must be strong
13. What is your favorite ice cream? -- peanut butter cup with peanut butter swirls
14. What is the first think you notice about people? -- depends on the situation
15. Red or pink? -- blue
16. What is your least favorite thing about yourself? -- i'm a wonderful person, what is there not to like? although sometimes i'm a little too modest.
17. Who do you miss the most? -- A friend from long ago
18. Do you want anyone to send this back to you? -- umm... that would require me to actually forward this.
19. What color pants and shoes are you wearing? -- grey and none
20. What was the last thing you ate? -- does a piece of ice count?
21. What are you listening to right now? -- silence
22. If you were a crayon, what color would you be? -- plain old fashioned blue
23. Favorite smell? -- apple pie baking in the oven
24. Who was the last person you talked to on the phone?--my husband
25. Do you like the person who sent this to you? -- of course, i love my aunt
26. Favorite sports to watch? -- football & soccer
27. Hair color? -- naturally? a brownish blond. however, right now it's brown
28. Eye color? -- very blue
29. Do you wear contacts? -- sometimes
30 Favorite food? -- pizza, damn near any kind
31. Scary movies or happy endings? -- happy endings. i hate scary movies.
32. Last movie you watched? -- Accepted
33. What color shirt are you wearing? -- white
34. Summer or winter? -- winter, definitely
35. Hugs or kisses? -- depends on who's giving them
36. Favorite dessert? -- don't really do the dessert thing (long story)
37. Most likely to respond? -- again, that would require me to forward this
38. Least likely to respond? -- getting a little repetitive
39. What book are you reading now? -- i'm not reading a book, obviously. i'm playing on the computer
40. What is on your mouse pad? -- dell, but i do have a star wars wrist pad for the keyboard
41. What did you watch on TV last night? -- def comedy jam (at least that's what i think it's called)
42. Favorite sound? -- silence
43. Rolling Stones or the Beatles? -- beatles
44. What is the farthest you have been away from home? -- mexico city, mexico
45. Do you have a special talent? -- not one i'm willing to share on this blog.. that's between me and my husband. :)
46. Where were you born? -- mars? oh wait.. no it was indiana. same thing.

And the season is over...

2008-01-13T17:25:00.000-05:00

I am most definitely disappointed about the Colts loss, although not all that surprised. We had a great season but still... it just wasn't there. There's always next year. Now, of course, my only hope is that the Patriots lose. :) I'd definitely hate to see them win the Super Bowl.

I would add my opinions of the game but I'm too upset to even think about the details of the game. The game was seriously ridiculous. Just fan-fucking-tastic.

Flickr

2007-12-19T22:03:00.000-05:00

I recently purchased a new camera, the first digital camera that I've ever owned. And yes, I do know that I'm a little behind the times. So now I've been playing on Flickr.com and uploaded tons of pictures. The problem with me and photography is that I am really not a very creative person. I just do not have that ability to find a great picture in seemingly nothing. I try though. But usually they just look like blurry version of the real thing. But I'm having an absolute blast playing on it.

This is the best I could come up with in reference to the "artistic" pictures. I know, it's sad. But I tried. :)Here's my favorite so far:

So my photos are available at:
http://www.flickr.com/photos/joanieofarc/ or you can just click on one of the pictures. :)

College

2008-01-12T13:01:00.000-05:00

I have officially started classes again at IUPUI. Yay. I can barely contain my excitement. I'm taking this Spanish Composition course. Really, what could be more fun that writing in Spanish? I am horrible at writing stories and such in English let alone in Spanish. This at least is the last class on the road toward a Spanish minor. So as long as I pass this class, I will have my minor. One would think that with all those Spanish classes, I would at least be able to passably get by speaking the language. But alas, that ability escapes me.

Colts!

2008-01-12T12:46:00.000-05:00

So most likely the final game to be played at the RCA Dome will be tomorrow... I cannot wait! I am desperately praying that the Colts win. (As I am sure damn near everyone in Indy is doing.) The Colts vs the Chargers. The last game we played against the Chargers was simply miserable or as I like to say, freaking ridiculous.

Here's a picture of our new stadium though:

My Favorite Event at Christmas Time

2007-12-19T22:33:00.000-05:00

The coolest thing I get to do every year is help with the Christmas "shopping spree" at my mom's work. My mom works for a nonprofit organization in Indianapolis and every year they have a huge Christmas give away. Families from the surrounding area sign up ahead of time and get an appointment to "shop" for their families. This is an amazing thing. The amount of donations every year is astounding. Even though they could not afford to buy presents they are able to give their children an amazing Christmas. The items are sorted into four different groups. A: which are more expensive presents (large toys, cd players, etc); B: which are generally smaller, cheaper toys/gifts; C: which are clothing items ranging from an outfit (shirt and pants) to winter coats to shoes; D: which are simply household items (blankets, sheets, etc). The parents are able to choose one A, two B, two C for each child. Each family gets one D item. Freebies include hats and gloves for each person and wrapping paper (and many other things). This more than anything really helps me to get into the Christmas spirit.

Freaking Ridiculous

2007-11-11T23:46:00.000-05:00

Photo by Getty Images

I think the title about sums it all up. Okay, I understand losing to the Patriots. The Colts made some mistakes and the Patriots are a good team (although I'm loath to admit it). But tonights game against the Chargers was simply bullshit. Granted numerous important players are out due to injuries (six starting offensive players including Harrison) but seriously... how in the hell do you miss a 29 yard field goal? Maybe it's time to find a new kicker. It feels like Vinatieri has missed more fields than he's made in the last two games. Manning brings us all the way back from being down 23-0 to 23-21. And then Adam Vinatieri misses a 29 yard field goal. I could make a 29 yard field goal. And six interceptions? SIX interceptions? I feel ill just thinking about it. Hopefully Harrison will be back next week. We desperately need him, a new kicker, apparently better special teams and a better secondary. So now we are 7-2. Fan-fucking-tastic. I still support the Colts, don't get me wrong, but what the hell was that?

the first snow fall of winter...

2007-12-05T09:13:00.000-05:00

"the first snow fall of winter" sounds nice and all... but the traffic is horrible! We get snow every year. People have to drive in it every year. WHY DO THEY STILL TRY TO SPEED?? Four wheel drive vehicles really don't help on solid ice. It never fails. When it's raining or snowing, it seems that everyone forgets how to drive. It's like "Oh my god! what is this? it's wet and falling from the sky! I should drive fast to get through it."

Egos bigger than dicks.....

2007-12-07T21:46:00.000-05:00

So I have to work with this guy who is 71 years old and bitter. He is still working 6 days a week....and its probably hard to find 5 people in this world that still actually "like" the guy. After making me feel stupid and like a complete ass, I was enlightened today that "Dr. -------- is a perfect example of what happens to a person when their ego gets bigger than their dick!"

Where the smart people are.....

2007-10-24T10:25:00.000-04:00

So sometimes i look around myself and think "Gee, everyone around here looks half retarded". A wise man I met once told me that they look half retarded because they are. just think about it. Think of the most average person you know.......now that you have that person in mind, think half of the world is dumber than that. Astounding isn't it?

At the same time you must consider that half of the world is also smarter than that average joe. So my question: Where are all these "smart" people?

After lots of hours of trying to prove the thesis "smart people do not exist" i have finally been able to reject the null hypothesis, with the following data:

1) They are not at pizza hut, because my order is always wrong.
2) They are not at Wal-mart, because they can't figure out how to take off my coupon.
3) They are not at the pharmacy, because they cannot figure out my insurance card.
4) They are not at McDonalds, because they think that "a lot" of honey means 3.
5) They are not patients at the ER, because they shoot themselves with BB guns.

I know, I know....the suspense is killing you.....where are they???? Well, now that you have the point i will leave out the other places they are not......

Drum Roll please......................................

.....................................................................

They ARE at the Puffs Plus Tissue (I had kleenex there, but then i realized that kleenex is a brand....therefore i have begun to act like the dumb people) factory!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

After dealing with the people at the ER, where once again, they are not...I have gotten the worst cold, sinus infection, and ear infection which was horrible. But looking on the bright side of things as i always do, this has brought me to discover the new Puffs Plus with Vick's Tissues.

So in conclusion, since only a real genius could have invented Puffs Plus with Vicks, I am rejecting the null hypothesis that there are no smart people in the world. Therefore, smart people can be found at the Puffs Plus Tissue factory :)

Is Skinny Worth It?

2007-10-26T18:52:00.001-04:00

Okay. Also I can say is that being "skinny" is great and all. But it seems to me that being health is way more important. With half of the Hollywood women grossly underweight, it is really that amazing to think that we have such a huge problem in this country with eating disorders?

About six years ago, I lost a lot of weight due to the fact that I was sick all the time for about two years. I couldn't keep anything down. I didn't intentionally get sick but I was sick all the same. I can't imagine making myself go through that again. I was miserable, depressed, and exhausted. Why would someone intentionally put their body through that?

Bulimia Nervosa according to the National Eating Disorder Association has three main symptoms: "Regular intake of large amounts of food accompanied by a sense of loss of control over eating behavior. Regular use of inappropriate compensatory behaviors such as self-induced vomiting, laxative or diuretic abuse, fasting, and/or obsessive or compulsive exercise. Extreme concern with body weight and shape." So if the symptoms aren't bad enough on their own the health consequences are even worse. The NEDA website states that the health complications of bulimia nervosa include: "Electrolyte imbalances that can lead to irregular heartbeats and possibly heart failure and death. Electrolyte imbalance is caused by dehydration and loss of potassium and sodium from the body as a result of purging behaviors. Inflammation and possible rupture of the esophagus from frequent vomiting. Tooth decay and staining from stomach acids released during frequent vomiting. Chronic irregular bowel movements and constipation as a result of laxative abuse."

The warning signs of Anorexia Nervosa include "Dramatic weight loss. Preoccupation with weight, food, calories, fat grams, and dieting. Refusal to eat certain foods, progressing to restrictions against whole categories of food e.g. no carbohydrates, etc.). Frequent comments about feeling “fat” or overweight despite weight loss. Anxiety about gaining weight or being “fat.” Denial of hunger. Development of food rituals (e.g. eating foods in certain orders, excessive chewing, rearranging food on a plate). Consistent excuses to avoid mealtimes or situations involving food. Excessive, rigid exercise regimen--despite weather, fatigue, illness, or injury--the need to “burn off” calories taken in. Withdrawal from usual friends and activities. In general, behaviors and attitudes indicating that weight loss, dieting, and control of food are becoming primary concerns." The health complications/consequences of anorexia nervosa are "Abnormally slow heart rate and low blood pressure, which mean that the heart muscle is changing. The risk for heart failure rises as heart rate and blood pressure levels sink lower and lower. Reduction of bone density (osteoporosis), which results in dry, brittle bones. Muscle loss and weakness. Severe dehydration, which can result in kidney failure. Fainting, fatigue, and overall weakness. Dry hair and skin, hair loss is common. Growth of a downy layer of hair called lanugo all over the body, including the face, in an effort to keep the body warm."

Although I understand that sometimes it's hard to be happy with yourself and what you look like, but the complications of these disorders are just plain scary. Can you imagine? Cardiac arrest at 19? It is just not worth it. I'd rather be alive and happy than skinny and miserable. So many young women lose themselves in these disorders.

Okay, I know. I probably went a little overboard on the info and could have probably just inserted the links, but I really want people to understand the dangers of these disorders. It is really important to improve the body image that girls and young women have.

Finally!

2007-11-23T13:07:00.000-05:00

Okay, so the Colts have now won two games in a row. It's still difficult to say whether or not they'll be able to go all the way to the Super Bowl again. We'll see. At least I feel better having won again.